Pregnancy Distractions

It's the OCD. It's my last pregnancy. It's because Dave's headed to the "chop" shop next
week. There will be no more pregnancies. And somehow I'm mourning.

And, it's a busy week - I have to get my fill of all the excuses...

Lately, even the prospect of to buy or not to buy a maternity swimsuit is a little overwhelming. Looking in the mirror is a disasterous situation I wish to venture alone...but really can I have a magic looking glass that hides me from the rest of the public (my husband) of the whale I've become?

Wallowing? No!

There is a beautiful baby boy growing stong inside my belly. Someone so loved already. so anticipated. So encouraging. So ready to share the world with.

I can get over my vain desire to remain non-plus sized. In return
Can I keep all these memories of Will and Avery that remind me that life is glorious even in it's struggles?
Please, let me remember what it feels like when Avery sees me when I walk into her classroom, kids club, corner and she is screams --MaaMaa! I missed you!
-Can we go wait for the boys?
-I don't like the way he/she sings.
- No, I don't want to make a new friend.
- BuhBuh's being mean to me.
- Are you mad at me?
-I don't want to wear that one.
-Can I be a princess?
- I don't want to marry a prince. Can I marry Daddy? Will?

And Will, the prodigal son, who is always torn between pleasing you and his consuming wants and desires.
-Mom! Can I earn some stars? Sure, go outside and play with your sister, clean your room, help set the table. Oh, you've changed your mind...yeah, but can I play my PSP?
-Mom! When are we going on a date day? Grandma's and Grandpa's? Toy store? Book store? Gym? Dave and Buster's? Target?
-Mom! Your the best cooker in the world! How many bites of brussel sprouts, soy meat lasagna, spinach and cous-cous do I have to eat?
-Mom! Can I be a solider? Sure, after college. Can I play football? Sure, in college. Mom! I got a paper cut six days ago, and it still hurts.
Please, don't let me forget that when Will and Avery look into my eyes I see they're beautiful souls dancing with enthusiasm and all life's possibilities. I pray that it their spark never goes away. It might dull, it might get sidelined by little things (like homework, cleaning the bathroom, eating all your vegetables, sharing Legos with your sister, gaining weight when your pregnant, sitting on peas after your vascectomy) but it's still there ready to tackle tomorrow without bruising too bad.